I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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