I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
