We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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