She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
