We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
porn star boner night. come get it.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Randomize
