dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
