just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
