that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize
