Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
