i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
