i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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