My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
