i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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