She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
