My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
bring money and cleavage
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
