I'm laying in your front yard are you home
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I use my feet as sexual weapons
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
