Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It's just like the Real World with babies
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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