no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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