I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
My ATM looks so different sober.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
