i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Randomize
