So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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