my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I just want nice things and good sex
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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