where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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