96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
