o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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