There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
