you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
