I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
worst night to have a conscience
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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