It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
