1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
