She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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