just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize