Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
