I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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