the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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