The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Randomize
