his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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