his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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