How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
