I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
