is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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