ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
