I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
