He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize