HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
