u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize
