god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I AM VODKA MAN
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
