And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
