I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
