So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
